Past, Present, Future

Ok, y'all... not my typical blog post. None the less, just a day in the life...

I've been pondering if I'm hitting an early mid-life crisis. Not the kind where I plan to run out and purchase a new car or perhaps plastic surgery. (Not that I wouldn't consider either of these if we had the funds!) Just the kind where I reflect on the life I've led, what I've accomplished, and what I still hope to accomplish.

The internet tells me a mid-life crisis can happen anytime between age 30 and 45. I am 36. So what leads me to ask this question? I seem to keep reflecting on the past. I begin at age 25 when Kevin and I lived in Westlake, Ohio and worked downtown Cleveland, in TV news. Back then, our weekend mornings were so nice and relaxing. Over coffee at Panera, we would have brilliant, adult conversation... all the while, sharing a cinnamon roll. We would discuss and plan our fabulous future together.

From Westlake, I fixate on Streetsboro, Ohio. Kevin still worked at the Cleveland TV station, and I worked as a TV news reporter in Youngstown. It was while we were in Streetsboro that our work schedules permitted us to have "date night" each Friday evening, after I got off of work. It was always the Winking Lizard where we would dine and relax.

Then, it was on to Marysville, Ohio where I always say, our lives truly began. We bought our first home, brought home a baby boy to that new home, and three and a half years later, brought home a baby girl! I ended my full-time career then to become a stay-at-home mom.

After 5 years in Marysville, Kevin was transferred to Cincinnati, and that is when our present journey began, here in southern Ohio. I really like our town (we have been here three years), I love our schools, and we have made some wonderful friends. Things really are good, but yet, I reflect. On one hand, it seems like just yesterday we were a care-free couple up in Cleveland. Other times, it seems as though that was so long ago!!!

I think the biggest reason I reflect now is, because never in a million years did I see our life path headed in this direction... adopting... an OLDER child! Never did I think I would give up a career in TV news... but then, I became a mom. Never did I think I would give up a career in corporate PR... but then, I became a mom of two. And never, ever, ever, EVER did I think we would be on a journey pursuing the adoption of a child, from Russia!

This recent choice (to adopt) has made me do a double-take of my life! I'm sure Kevin is feeling some of the same things but doesn't feel the need to vocalize things like I do. Anyhow, adoption is the ultimate commitment! One example, I will be home-schooling our 11-year-old daughter for several months until school starts... helping to teach her English. Who would have ever guessed I would do something like that? Additionally, I'm trying to decide what I will do for employment when I go back to work in two years. (Karrigan will be in school full-time then.) One thing I know for sure, is that this time around, I want to do something meaningful, and I would prefer it had something to do with orphan care or adoption. Never did I imagine this, as I was preparing my course load at Ohio State, back in the day! I believe this new passion of mine stems from personal growth... from God. As we mature (and get some gray hair) we begin to see life in new ways. We start to see the things in life that really matter. We begin to take note that our days are numbered. Not to be depressing by that statement... it's just acknowledgement that in the grand scheme of things, we only have a little bit of time on this earth, so we be better do the best job we can! A song I recently heard had a line that stuck out... "We gotta do better than this 'cause we've only got one chance to make a difference." So true... it's now or never.

Sooo... my conclusion. I am happy with the way my life has turned out thus far. I am happy with what I've accomplished, professionally. I am happy with what I've accomplished, personally. (I continue to not only be thrilled but amazed by the man I married! And I thank God daily for the children he has given us... one healthy boy and one healthy girl.) Life has been good... so I should reflect. I should remember. I should reminisce. And... I should be so grateful that God is giving me more to accomplish, this time a job from Him... that I didn't even need to apply for.